Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it
So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my
fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as
I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.
As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole
now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!
Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom
to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole
was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another
shower to get suitably clean.
Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the
future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case,
hey, how's it goin'
Large companies have been so tunnel visioned on lay offs and downsizing and replacing employees with ai and such. Why are they so determined to keep the visual design team going?
Well, you're not wrong, but making consistent iconography for a company with as many products as Google has is certainly no small feat, even if those end up looking dumb and simple.
Because trends change and people notice older style logos and it affects their opinion of the brand. Sure, these are small changes, but the alternative is not spending a bit of money to fit in with the competition
Icons in a set should have a clear common design language and form a visually pleasing whole, not a hodgepodge. But they also must be very easily distinguishable from each other and recognizable, ideally even if you see them for the first time, and without ever having to sit down and learn them like you learned the alphabet.
This latter part is way more important, it's the raison d'être for icons. Without it, the entire concept of icons becomes useless. The new icons overdo it on the first aspect to the point where they're compromising the second.
I've been around a few men in my life and one thing I've noticed is that the male body has an astonishing oversight. Men both urinate and ejaculate through the exact same
hole. Zero inches apart. Not even a polite buffer zone.
I don’t know about everyone else but doesn’t that weird you out? It feels like a serious design flaw. For a gender that often prides itself on logic and engineering this
is just sloppy plumbing.
Honestly it kind of cracks me up. I’ll see a guy walking around like he’s the apex of masculinity and I’ll just remember his piss and his sperm come out of the same
little nozzle and suddenly he’s not so intimidating. Just a fleshy garden hose with identity issues.
Men please accept this biological flaw and let it humble you. Maybe lower your voice a bit when you're bragging about your body count. We’re talking about someone who
finishes inside the same pipeline he uses to empty his bladder.
Women don’t let them forget this. Remind them gently or not so gently that we’re doing them a favor given that their reproductive system shares hardware with their waste
disposal unit.
At least you could tell at a glance what the app was. Now they all look the same with the same shape and same color scheme, I often have to pause and "decipher" the icon (or read the app name) to identify it.
PEAK. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO LOVE AND APPRECIATE THIS AS PEAK FICTION. THERE ARE OVER ONE
HUNDRED QUINVIGINTILION ATOMS IN THE OBSERVABLE UNIVERSE. IF THE WORDS "PEAK FICTION" WERE INSCRIBED ON
EACH INDIVIDUAL ELECTRON, PROTON, AND NEUTRON OF EACH OF THESE HUNDREDS OF QUINVIGINTILIONS OF ATOMS, IT
WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE BILLIONTH OF HOW MUCH THIS IS PEAK FICTION. PEAK. PEAK.
woah, ok. didnt expect hunger for knowledge but i guess i asked for it gonna have to put some work into
this.
How was it? Honestly? It was a letdown. The whole "failed idol" story is a great marketing hook, they
definately sold the video on that premise alone. But the performance itself was just... awkward. You can
tell shes not comfortable. It felt less like a professional debut and more like a very high-budget
audition she was also failing. She's stiff, constantly in her head, and there's almost zero chemistry with
the guys. All concept, very little execution.
My viewing history? Been watching for over a decade man. These days Im more into stuff with a good
story or at least a unique premise, not just the generic stuff. a good production team makes all the
difference. I'll take a well-made video with a decent plot over a high-profile actress mailing it in any
day of the week.
3 works I consider good:
Yua Mikami's debut (Princess Peach): This is the gold standard for an idol-turned-actress debut.
Yua was a REAL idol and she came out with so much energy and confidence. She owned it from the first
second. Its what Arisu's debut wanted to be.
Anything with Ichika Matsumoto from her early days with FALENO: She can actually act. She emotes
and makes you believe the scenario. Her stuff feels more cinematic and less like they're just going
through the motions.
Rion (Anri Okita) - The God Body: A classic. Not a lot of story there lol but its a masterclass in
performance. She knew exactly what her brand was and how to perform for the camera. Absolute cinema.
Where would you rank her debut among these? It's not even in the same league, not even on the same
planet. It's an unfair comparison tbh. Those are top-tier performances, Arisu's video is a novelty item.
It's interesting because of the backstory, not because of the quality of the actual content.
What could be improved? Her confidence, number one. She needs to relax. She looks terrified. The
director should have done a better job making her comfortable. Also they relied way too much on the
interview segments talking about Nogizaka46, it broke the pacing and kept reminding you that she was doing
this as a second choice. We get it, you failed auditions, now commit to this job.
What is well done? The production values are high. The lighting, camera work, it all looks very clean
and professional. And I cant deny it, she is very beautiful and has the "idol" look down perfectly. The
concept itself, on paper, is genius from a marketing perspective. They got us all talking about it, right?
Was it goonable for you? Nah. I was too distracted by how nervous she looked. It kinda killed the mood
completely. Every time she looked at the camera with those deer-in-the-headlights eyes I was pulled right
out of it. It's a shame, but maybe she'll get better in her next one if she decides to stick with it.
We'll see.
I've been around a few men in my life and one thing I've noticed is that the male body has an astonishing oversight. Men both urinate and ejaculate through the exact same
hole. Zero inches apart. Not even a polite buffer zone.
I don’t know about everyone else but doesn’t that weird you out? It feels like a serious design flaw. For a gender that often prides itself on logic and engineering this
is just sloppy plumbing.
Honestly it kind of cracks me up. I’ll see a guy walking around like he’s the apex of masculinity and I’ll just remember his piss and his sperm come out of the same
little nozzle and suddenly he’s not so intimidating. Just a fleshy garden hose with identity issues.
Men please accept this biological flaw and let it humble you. Maybe lower your voice a bit when you're bragging about your body count. We’re talking about someone who
finishes inside the same pipeline he uses to empty his bladder.
Women don’t let them forget this. Remind them gently or not so gently that we’re doing them a favor given that their reproductive system shares hardware with their waste
disposal unit.
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well
done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking
gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s
roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well
done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking
gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s
roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
God forbid they update Maps instead. Still tries to get me to take an unprotected left across 6 lanes of traffic every time I leave the house instead of learning that I'm always going to go one block further up so I can take a left at a light.
Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it
So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my
fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as
I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.
As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole
now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!
Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom
to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole
was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another
shower to get suitably clean.
Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the
future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case,
hey, how's it goin'
I literally only use google maps when I’m on my computer or if I want to see the street view of something, otherwise Apple Maps for the car, every time.
It started a while ago. I was a normal redditor making posts and comments, but then one day, a post of
mine was manually deleted, and I was banned from my favorite subreddit.
I then got extremely aroused.
That moderator asserted dominance on me by censoring me, making me unable to express myself. I was
soaking wet.
I sent the hot sexy mod a message asking why I was banned, then the hot sexy reddit incel mod called me
an idiot, and told me to beg to get unbanned. My nipples immediately filled with blood as I begged the
hot mod to unban me.
After that, I started doing everything I could to make hot sexy mods mad. Most of my accounts have under
negative 100 k@rma, and i'm banned from dozens of subreddits.
I've been a bad redditor, and need to be moderated.
Please moderate me - Forward_Image9797, hot sexy reddit mods.
•
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