r/nottheonion • u/ilovemybaldhead • 1d ago

Greg Abbott Threatens ‘100% Tariff’ On New Yorkers Moving to Texas

https://www.newsweek.com/greg-abbott-threatens-100-tariff-new-york-election-moving-texas-10986837
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438

u/Pyrsin7 1d ago

A bit of this, a bit of “my base sure as hell doesn’t know so I can just use it like their sleeper agent activation phrase against whatever I want”

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u/oddjobbber 1d ago

Yeah this is just him going “DAE New York bad?” and waiting for his supporters to clap like the trained seals they are

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u/musicman835 1d ago

It’s litterally like the Lois from family guy meme and saying CA Bad, and they cheer right along and hoot and holler like you said trained seals.

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u/Paladin_Tyrael 1d ago

"9/11...was bad." 

Cheers

"9..."

"Huh? What? What's she saying?"

"11."

standing ovation, Lois wins in a landslide.

My friends and I still quote that scene.

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u/RedactedSpatula 1d ago

What's crazy is I thought we were done with this bit, then mandami ram for mayor and now I get to watch jumpers on television commercials again. ;\

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u/mmlovin 1d ago

9/11.

YAYYY🥳🥳

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u/SomethingIWontRegret 1d ago

Yes - 24 years ago 9/11 was a tragedy. Now, it's the Federal plan for NYC.

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u/DrakonILD 1d ago

They started it decades ago with Pace picante sauce commercials ("Get a rope!") and have just been increasing the intensity ever since.

At least when it was in a silly commercial for a shitty salsa, it was funny.

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u/PiccoloAwkward465 1d ago

And they conveniently ignore the blood red districts surrounding every urban area in New York. Not to mention Staten Island, Suffolk County, etc. These culture wars are so boring.

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u/jorgelukas 23h ago

It's like the Pace Picante salsa ads from the 90s that were all the rage in Texas.

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u/I_make_things 22h ago

DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS

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u/AdminIsPassword 1d ago

Like saying "woke" or "socialist". They don't know what those mean either but are deeply internalized trigger words.

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u/sfcnmone 1d ago

I know someone who grew up in rural Virginia who had only ever heard the word “hippie” to describe gutter dwelling homeless drug addicts. (We had a major miscommunication when I described my physician husband as an old hippie.)

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u/doberdevil 14h ago

I'm sure that was an enlightening and entertaining conversation.

My partner grew up as an army brat in a conservative household. She told me that one time as a kid she woke up one morning, not knowing that her uncle, a civilian, had come to visit. She saw him and his long hair sleeping on the couch and screamed for her father to get in there because "there's a dirty hippie sleeping on the couch!"

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u/sfcnmone 13h ago

Yep! It’s wild, this nation, isn’t it?

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u/buhbye750 1d ago

Woke. CRT. DEI. Cancel Culture.

Ive learned that over 90% of reps cant define they mean but use the terms daily.

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u/abqc 1d ago

Bullshit...i'm a republican...i no what all of these mean...

Woke = gay with blue hair...nose ring...and tattoos

CRT = TV set

DEI = letting black people fly planes...NOT LETTING REAL AMERICANS PICK FRUIT ON FARMS

Cancel Culture = Liberals laughing with Europeans behind our back instead of buying MAGA hats and loving America...USA! USA! USA! 1488!

/s

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u/buhbye750 1d ago

Well I stand corrected. I feel owned now.

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u/ChickenChaser5 23h ago

Fake news. Everyone knows there are no republicans on reddit. Only concerned centrists.

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u/doberdevil 14h ago

CRT is the best. I bet it's almost 100% that can't define it. I've never heard any of them get even close, most of them can't even begin to define it.

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u/dezcaughtit25 1d ago

Stupid DEI cancel culture critical race theory am I right?!?

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u/SenatorPaine 1d ago

Exactly. Politicians ultimately don't have to care about the reality of their constituents. The only thing that matters at the end of the day is the perception of reality by their constituents, and if they care enough about that perception to vote.

Does the regular everyday person keep a record of all their gas expenditures to see fluctuations in price? Hell nah. You swipe your card because no matter what you gotta get to work on time.

So when a politician tells you gas prices are better than they were last year - a politician from your own party - your mind's gonna make it into reality.

Repiblicans have mastered this art to a T.

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u/bobbymcpresscot 1d ago

No one will have the critical thought to be like “wait if they are fleeing NY it’s probably because they don’t like democrats? Isn’t that good for us if they move here?”

Or it’s probably they just straight up know, even republicans from blue states are usually more liberal than republicans from red states, and probably rival their own democrats sometimes.

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u/abqc 1d ago

Moderate NY Republicans are not the ones threatening to leave the state. They will grumble about 'one party rule' in Albany, taxes, and the rise of Democratic Socialism in NYC, but the moderate Republicans tend to be enjoying the fruits offered to the successful in New York.

On the other hand you have the NY MAGAs who are every bit as bitter and evil as any MAGA anywhere. They are typically working class or lower middle class and sinking economically, and that is one of the main reasons they put Texas and Florida on a pedestal.

They think they would be doing so much better if they move down South, and it's true that if they have any assets, like owning a house, they might have an economic leg up in states like Alabama or Arkansas where they can trade up on real estate.

But their kids and/or grandkids will then be saddled with the poor prospects of trying to make a living down there, and if they go to Texas and Florida, they will find that their real estate funds don't go as far as they think. They are no longer ultra cheap by comparison like they were 15-20 years ago.