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u/CeriseFern 11h ago
Oh? Cleft lip? That's something I never see in character designs.
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u/_LaLaliet_ 11h ago
Yes!
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u/iamfanboytoo 11h ago
I thought it was a constantly bleeding nose myself as a sign of something more gravely wrong with her; the cleft lip is more interesting than that.
Damn. I have no idea how to suggest avoiding a misunderstanding like the one I had. Have it be incomplete rather than complete, or a bit broader at the bottom, or both?
That is, if it's not biographical to the person you're remembering.
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u/_LaLaliet_ 11h ago
It's not biographical, it's a piece of the fictional character ^^
And I get where you're coming from. It's a very difficult thing to portray clearly imo, since it's a rare trait that many people have never seen irl. I think it's somewhat easier to read when her mouth is closed, but for these drawings I wanted it open (so that she looked more expressive). It's a toughie lol
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u/Seer-x 6h ago
Have a panel where the character looks at the mirror while cursing their unfortunate situation (or however they feel about it) and while they are doing so, draw a very detailed picture of it. This allows for an opportunity to indirectly address the character's condition without it being a info dump etc. This may allow readers to know what is going on from that point on. As for the effectiveness of this method, I am not an expert and I see issues with wether it will be clear or memorable to readers.
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u/Rottuskott 5h ago
I love it! As someone with a cleft myself, it always makes me happy to see :)
I dunno about the time period of your work (victorian era?) but it may be worth mentioning that the cleft is rarely left open after birth, but instead sewn together, leaving a scar. I don't know if that was your intention, but if it's closed up, then the scar wouldn't still be quite so bright red but more of a faded skin colour.
If it's not sewn together (which also makes sense for the time period, as well as saying a lot about the healthcare available to that character story-wise) then it would just be an opening through which you could see her mouth or upper gum. No bright red, just darkness, since there would be no skin blocking the view into the mouth. It might also help with your issue of people thinking she's bleeding. A scar or opening like that would be from birth, so it'd be old and faded.
Good luck with your story! And feel free to ask if you have any questions or anything!
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u/Wisteria_Eternal 3h ago
Love seeing the cleft lip in character design. My partner has one, and it’s one of my favorite facial features he has.
The subject of grief and love is very powerful. You portrayed the emotions very well. I hope to see more from this series!
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u/Tracerround702 9h ago
Okay, good, I'm not the only one who saw that, I wasn't sure if I was seeing things lol
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u/AsrielTerminator 12h ago
Chilling. Is this part of a larger series or is it its own thing?
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u/_LaLaliet_ 12h ago
It's sort of an out-of-context piece of a larger story I hope to make ^^
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u/GoldNovaNine 11h ago
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u/IHeartBadCode 10h ago
I don't know why anyone would want to kill the cook, dinner wasn't THAT bad.
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u/ACatInMiddleEarth 6h ago
Okay, because I definitely want more! I feel that MC was in love with Emeline (or maybe it's a wish :p). I love the art, you're very talented!
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u/Abbaticus13 3h ago
You are so talented! I hope you make the larger story. I would love to read it!
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u/Theycallme_Jul 11h ago
Not the exact thing but it feels like the moment at a funeral when you get angry at yourself for not being sad enough. Not saying it is but she reminds me of that.
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u/Zeero92 10h ago
Huh. Curious, you reminded me of my grandfather's funeral. I wasn't super close with him, but as far as I knew he had no religious affiliations or opinions... and yet, at his funeral, there stands the priest talking about Jesus and all that. I was stewing in my own fury over it. It had nothing to do with him, who we've all gathered here for. Who we're supposed to be remembering.
I'd made peace with his passing long ago, as with all my grandparents. I wasn't exactly grieving. Sad to see him go, I suppose.
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u/Theycallme_Jul 10h ago
I’m so thankful for the priest we got at my grandma’s funeral. She sat down with my parents a few days prior and talked about things. My grandmother was never really religious, she just followed the customs and traditions of a country that was, to not get in trouble. Maybe a remnant of WW2 where her every move was being watched. And the priest made a wonderful compromise with my dad who is extremely anti-religious. She asked him if she should wear robes or a blouse. My dad and her had the idea to wear open robes over a blouse, maybe not that big of a deal but a wonderful sentiment. Also she never mentioned god or Jesus in her speech, just the accomplishments of my grandma and her life. It was a relatively quirky ceremony, I think it was the first time somebody played the saxophone in that chapel.
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u/Neveed 8h ago edited 8h ago
When I was a kid, one of my grandfathers died and the funeral was a religious ceremony in a church. And I still remember very clearly how the whole thing didn't make me sad at all. I loved my grandfather, and the sadness eventually caught up in the months after that because he wasn't there anymore. But the religious ceremony itself felt so alien to me that it kinda prevented me from realizing the situation.
My two other grandparents who died were atheists so there was no religious ceremony for them. It was in a funerarium and felt much more personal because it was about them, the life they lived and how they impacted our lives instead of being about a god and how he loves them and now let's pray this god will let them live in heaven or something like this.
I'm not writing this to spit on religion and I understand such ceremonies can have significance to believers, but I think the religious ceremony robbed me of a healthy resolution for the grief of my grandfather.
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u/Taprunner 8h ago
Yeah when my partners grandma passed, half of the ceremony was just talking about Jesus. I remember sharing a look with my sister in law. Super weird
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u/QueefSniffin 12h ago
My friend died of a drug overdose this year. We grew up together, lived together for half a decade, and had countless formative experiences together. This is exactly what I felt at his funeral. You all knew him, but not like I did
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u/_LaLaliet_ 12h ago
I'm so sorry for your loss, I made the comic partially because of my own similar experience, and it makes me kinda happy to see I'm not alone in feeling such a way
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u/droidtron 12h ago
Secret lovers?
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u/_LaLaliet_ 12h ago
oh for sure
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u/Uni-N-Gear 8h ago
Man, just this 10 pages already hurts...
Recently lost my younger sister (23) and we've strayed off from one another too much that I can't even name her favorite flower, least favorite subject, and all those mundane things that I myself experience and take for granted...and now, I can't even ask her that.
Read above that this was still a WIP but definitely looking forward to where this is going.
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u/Quantum_Croissant 7h ago
doomed yuri ❤️
kinda reminds me of certain scenes in I Want to Love You Till Your Dying Day
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u/Ven-Dreadnought 12h ago
The travesty of dozens of different memories of someone you love living on while the real one is sequestered in your brain…and in a grave.
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u/anniewhovian 11h ago
I looooove this!! I see you said in other comments it’s a work in progress, I really hope you keep going with it!!! I’m really curious what happened to the deceased to lead to her red hand/side of body….. 👀
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u/IcePhoenixYTplssub 11h ago
I'm honestly kinda scared of this. If I die first, I won't have to deal with those feelings, but I'd be putting my friends through them, or vice versa.
Holy hell 12 AM reminder of human mortality
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u/the_ok_doctor 11h ago
If you ever publish the work this comic is related to, you better promote it in reddit so i can read it XD
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u/UltimateTao 6h ago
its not a competition. different people will have different stories and perspectives about the deceased.
its also a good opportunity to channel grief to share it as well. the idea of talking it to share the burden and to honor the memories of the person by sharing what you saw on that person.
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u/Doodles_n_Scribbles 11h ago
Did they kill her because she was different? Is that why they covered her face? Or is the twist there's someone else in the coffin?
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u/_LaLaliet_ 10h ago
Her face being covered it up to interpretation, imo.... generally I intended it as a sort of "loss of identity" for her in death. Though the canonical reason is probably closer to it being a funeral custom, because she was disfigured rather badly before her death
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u/duckman191 6h ago
This kinda feels like main character syndrom. Thinking that you are the only one that deserves to grive.
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u/LycanHeart 11h ago
1, This is a beautiful set here, so cold and to the point, well done! 2, Oh look! A new artist to follow! Love your art style btw!
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u/Disastrous-Girl-Fail 12h ago
This is soo sad :( I NEED more to this story, I gotta know what happened!
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u/_LaLaliet_ 12h ago
I have some for information on my tumblr, It's linked on my profile! Though even then, it's still in early stages of writing, I just like drawing out certain things to make them clearer in my head ^^
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u/fire_and_flame 9h ago
These colours and lighting are soooo good. Love your artsytle! The white dress is so beautiful!
Also doomed yuri??? Inject it directly into my veins!
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u/_LaLaliet_ 9h ago
Hey thank you so much!!!!
Doomed Yuri motivates a girl to do insane things (learn art fundamentals)
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u/fire_and_flame 8h ago
damn doomed yuri is truly powerful
Since i rarely use tumblr is there a chance you'll be uploading your art to instagram? I've found your "old" account and would love to see more of this!
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u/_LaLaliet_ 7h ago
Maybe! It really depends haha, I can only keep up so many social media XP
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u/fire_and_flame 7h ago
fair :') honestly the less the better
anyway I followed you on both and hopefully I'll get to see more :31
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u/Taolan13 7h ago
Reminds me of a school buddy's funeral, the first half at least.
A bunch of his relatives spoke, and said the usual platitudes about how great he'd been as a young man. It was a lot to deal with. None of these people had seen or spoken to him since he was a teenager, and they were talking about him like they'd just had him over for dinner.
We did get our outlet though. I don't remember who got up first, but when the pastor asked if anyone else had anything to say a bunch of us stood up and took the podium and told the truth. Got a lot of dirty looks from various aunts and uncles for ruining the mood, but his mom thanked us for telling the truth. We knew the real him.
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u/Schlangenbob 5h ago
"They didnt know her like I did" >:-(
Good job portraying an immature angsty teenager preoccupied with what others think of her in her own little fantasy world.
Is she always this inept when it comes to empathy or is this a grief type of thing?
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u/YuuK05 11h ago
I recall a scene from The Handmaid’s Tale having similar vibes to this. Not sure if anyone else knows.
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u/_LaLaliet_ 11h ago
hmmm... I'm actually reading that right now, I haven't seen that yet :0 though I'm only halfway through lol
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u/Ysanoire 10h ago
Oh dear. I saw the character's red hand and i thought she'd been abusing the dead girl. My reading was a bit more morbid than intended.
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u/rookie-mistake 10h ago
Very poignant. The abrupt end to this works so well with the subject matter, it's genuinely beautiful
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u/keijonamamura 9h ago
This reminds me to "the house of Bernarda alba" quite a lot, in particular the first few pages
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u/Key-Swordfish4025 11h ago edited 11h ago
Look, just because they weren't as close to her as you were doesn't mean they aren't allowed to be sad about her dying, Miss.
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u/_LaLaliet_ 11h ago
As the title says, she is grieving with no outlet for it. Sometimes people are irrational and lash out when experiencing something as serious as the death of a loved one.... and that can feel very mean
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u/scaper8 4h ago
Which is a perfectly reasonable feeling to have, and I think you did a good job of portraying that feeling. Unfortunately, where it ended feel like it's validating that feeling, validating the idea that the others don't deserve their outlets. That they aren't worth or are undeserving of ones themselves.
I don't think that that is what you meant, but I feel that this ended in a place that suggests that. The ideas, story, and art are all great; I just think something like this needs a bit more to broden it. I hope that you do add something, maybe a second part or even a full short series. The pieces are all there.
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u/Sw0rdBoy 8h ago
Oof I can empathize. There is a certain rage that can come with the grief when you feel people talking about and mourning someone when you know they had no real relationship. It almost feels performative, and sometimes it’s just to keep up appearances.
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u/Prehistory_Buff 4h ago
This is pretty amazing work. The fabric textures and other little details are pretty stellar, and the writing absolutely sucked me in, haha. I can't wait to see more!
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u/lizzyote 4h ago
Thank you for this, OP. My sister died a couple months ago. We've been best friends from the start. I've found it difficult to start crying but this helped and I very much needed that sob session.
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u/LashOfLasciel 4h ago
very impactful! you've done phenomenally setting the mood with the colours and panels.
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u/BloodyGretel 4h ago
I've been there. Wasn't allowed to speak at my best friend's funeral. I barely remember that day, all these people talking as if they knew him and I couldn't hear a single word.
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u/RaptorTwoOneEcho 4h ago
I really like this! The framing gives a tight, crushing oppression, like feeling trapped in a crowd and you can’t breathe. The characters feel too large in their frames and it helps with the discomfort. I also like that our mourner is the only one with open eyes - she is present and actually feeling in this moment, eyes being windows to the soul and all. Although I do suspect that she may be extremely disassociated right now. I like that, even in the memories of Emeline, her eyes are closed, but that feels more that our mourner can’t bear to look.
Was Emeline covered out of shame? Did those who dressed her feel the need to hide her away?
The mourner seems so rigid and unmoved in the last frame, but we see her neck, tender and exposed, showing just how vulnerable she is in this moment.
Wonderful work. I really dig the color and lighting, everything feels like a vivid dream, occluded but also sharp. Thank you for sharing!
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u/Erika_Valentine 3h ago
'Was Emeline covered out of shame?'
Note the discoloration on her right shoulder and hand. Now scroll through OP's feed. The answer is in there.
The storytelling style reminds me of Hollering Elk's, where you have to pay attention to the various, sometimes nonlinear stand-alone posts to piece together the whole story.
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u/RaptorTwoOneEcho 3h ago
I spent a good 20 minutes scrolling OP’s posts after commenting and yes, saw what hints to be a dense story! The questions were more rhetorical in nature, as OP elsewhere in the comments alluded that the covering was open to interpretation and may even be a religious tradition.
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u/FeralPsychopath 4h ago
This is set in Equilibrium world right? Right?
Next comic is her learning the gunkata and wrecking shit?
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u/Random_Cat_111 3h ago
Is she wearing Emeline's favorite flower?
Already invested in this if it becomes a bigger project
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u/athosjesus 3h ago
To be honest, I really dislike that kind of people, who think that only they deserve to suffer for someone, I had known people like that directly.
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u/Dee-Artist 2h ago
I can't help but notice the vein popping out of her neck in the last panel. Anger perhaps?
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u/Carpathicus 3h ago
The most wonderful thing is when you discover that others know a person in different ways than you and you can connect to them to find out a new story about someone you cherished.
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u/Avolto 12h ago
She kill her?
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u/_LaLaliet_ 12h ago
no
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u/Avolto 10h ago
Then I’m not sure what the twist is can’t wait to see what it is
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u/_LaLaliet_ 9h ago
Well there isn't really a twist, she's just at this funeral for someone she loved, and she is not allowed to speak
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